Epilogue

Dear Journal:

This'll likely be the last time I write something in here.

I'll probably be too busy working on new potential works of art to bother writing new journal entries. But it's a small price to pay.

Besides, I needed the money to cover the costs of a house Miraj and Darlene had their eyes on.

Nice little place across the street. Nothing fancy, just one of those cozy places you'd see on one of them cable shows.

Better than this crapshack, at least.

Chapter 17: Birthdays for Two

(Note: Today there are two entries, on account of the holiday.)

Dear Journal:

Did I honestly expect Miraj's birthday to come up again so early?

No, not really. But sure enough, it was here again. I got him his cake, he thought of what he wanted to wish for.

Didn't take him too long to figure out what he wanted. He was already blowing out the candles, and the whole age mess started up again.

Chapter 16: Peace of Mind

Dear Journal:

It's been a long time since I've been to the Graveyard. As in, way too long.

A while back, I remembered talking shit about the place. Now, I don't remember why I did.

Oh, right...Full of dead people.

But now it doesn't seem so...spooky bad. Now it feels more like a necessary evil to me. All the dead people need to rest somewhere.

That way, if you need to talk to a dead relative, you know for sure where they are. I needed to know that, at least.

Having been away from this place for so long, I had to remember where he ended up. I had a feeling he was somewhere way in the back.

Lo and behold, I was right.

Chapter 15: A Bunch of Change

Dear Journal:

I visited Lisa today. I can't believe she's already grown up.

Well, I can, since she and I were in the same graduating class, but still. I remember when we used to wrestle outside during recess when we were kids.

But these days, elementary school just feels like a really fucked up fever dream to me now. I guess Lisa sort of felt the same way.

Then she brought something else up. She told me by saying, "Oh hey, VJ! Guess what?"

Chapter 14: Winter Wonders

Dear Journal:

Winter's here already?

Well, I shouldn't say that. It's been here for a while now. I guess I just haven't left the house enough to really notice it.

But Miraj sure did.

Even though I graduated and all that, I still had to get him to school.

I made sure he got to school on time, or at least had an excuse for lateness. He really wanted to go with me to see me register as a self-employed sculptor.

Then came the holiday.

Chapter 13: Growing Pains

Dear Journal:

What is it with me and forgetting birthdays? Like, that seems to be a recurring thing with me.

Well, Miraj didn't outright say it was a birthday. But I saw the cake, and drew my own conclusions.

Here, I thought, it can't be his birthday again already. It only seems like yesterday we had the last one. I told him, isn't it a little early for you to celebrate your birthday again?

Chapter 12: The Future is Spooky

Dear Journal:

Spooky Day came and went.

I wasn't really in the mood for trick-or-treating. Never really have been since my voice cracked. I figured, I'm getting too old for free candy anyway.

Miraj decided to stay home, too. I told him, if he wanted to go out and do it, I wasn't gonna stop him.

But nah, he said he'd rather stay home, and give out candy to the other kids.

Even though it had to be boring as hell, he said he didn't mind. And this way he didn't have to figure out what to go as for a costume.

Yeah, costumes can be creepy if done right. But there's scarier stuff than plastic masks and fake blood all over the place.

Chapter 11: Love Hurts

Dear Journal:

I've never even considered dating. I mean, what's so great about it? Sure, I went on a date with Lisa once, but that was it. And she and I were better off as just friends.

Miraj, well, I can't really see him dating, either. But just because I couldn't see him with someone else, didn't mean it couldn't happen.

I heard him talking on the phone when I got off from work a few days ago. He was talking to Lisa's mom if Darlene was there.

Darlene. Why Miraj would want to hang with Lisa's little sister is beyond me. But there he was, asking if she could come over.

Last I saw her, she wasn't much taller than Miraj. But then, that was when I last saw her.

The girl that showed up later...

Chapter 10: Brother in Arms

Dear Journal:

What am I supposed in this type of situation?

I mean, Miraj and I got along our whole lives. Suddenly he's getting into shit that he shouldn't be doing, and telling me I suck.

Just...what do I do? I know he's growing up, but I can't tell him how to live his life. I'm not Iqbal.

For the first time in our lives, we went to bed angry at each other.

But Miraj was right, I guess. It did seem hypocritical that I'd get mad at him for doing things I'm known for doing.

Come on, though. Kid knows better than that.

Still, going to bed without saying good night to your bro...Damn, that kinda smarts.

And I guess Miraj felt the same way.

Chapter 9: Do As I Say, Not As I Do

Dear Journal:

Just what in the ever-loving fuck got into Miraj today?

I've heard of getting up on the wrong side of the bed. A few of my old classmates said I was born on that wrong side.

They clearly did not know what Miraj was like that morning. Normally, he's pretty good about getting ready for school. But not today.

He fought me every step of the way. And he was cussing up a storm the entire time. Before the bus came, it was "fuck school" this, and "fuck you" that.

To be brutally honest, it was like a completely different person had taken over. I listened to his gutter-mouth until he went to school.

And then I listened to it when he got home. But getting home, well...

Chapter 8: Down in the Dumps

Dear Journal:

Sometimes I wonder what goes through my little bro's head.

I also wonder if he thinks everything completely through.

Apparently not.

When he said he wanted to try another route to make some extra cash, I told him he could help with the chickens.

He said it was a nice idea, but he wanted to try something else.

I thought maybe he wanted to get a job himself, or start a garden, or something.

Nope. His idea was...well, not what most people do for income. It was just...

Really, Miraj?

Chapter 7: In Separate Bunkers

Dear Journal:

Apparently, Miraj was desperate for his own room.

He never said anything until his birthday, but then again, maybe he was still thinking about what he wanted.

The other night, he came up to me, asking me if we got enough materials to put up a few walls.

I asked him, "What for?" We had plenty of walls and junk already.

"Well, you know that unfinished shed Dad had outside? Thought I'd do something with that." When Miraj said shed, I had to remember: 'Iqbal had a shed'?

Chapter 6: Birthday Blues

Dear Journal:

I'm so fucking stupid!

I should've known! Now I know why Miraj was doing the things he wanted to do yesterday!

He didn't want to go to the park on the weekend, he wanted a good night's sleep for once.

I should've known!

How is it I'm so stupid not to realize why he did what he was doing?

Chapter 5: Parked at the Festival

Dear Journal:

Today was a holiday from school, for both me and Miraj. He really wanted to take advantage of the day off, it seemed.

He came in this morning and asked if I could take him to the park.

I asked him to tell my why. He said that there was a festival going on, but he wouldn't say anything else.

The damn festival had been going on since the season started. I wanted to know why it had to be today, and he couldn't just enjoy the day off and go there during the weekend.

"It has to be today," was all he kept saying.

Eventually, I dropped everything I was doing, and I took him to the stupid festival.

Turns out he had ulterior motives.

Chapter 4: Money is no Object

Dear Journal:

Bookstore job may pay crap, but I managed to save up enough get one of those...

Ah, what the hell do you call them? Chicken...thing. The thing chickens live in. I got one of those. Miraj wanted to try to help out with the finances, so I scraped together enough to get one of those things.

He got the idea pretty quick. Sell the good eggs, get rid of the nasty ones.

I honestly didn't think he'd get lucky.

Chapter 3: Due To The Dead

Dear Journal:

I took Miraj's advice, and decided to go to school.

I also forgot how much I hate field trips. Especially field trips to the cemetery.

What's so great about the place? It's full of dead people, like it always is.

The only thing that really changes is exactly how many there are in the place. I mean, just a short time ago, they added one.

Chapter 2: The Book Job

Dear Journal:

...I got a job today.

I had to find some way to make ends meet. I mean yeah, I can't exactly get something full-time. I mean, who the hell hires a teenager for that sort of thing?

But I guess I got the next best thing.

Apparently, a few morons in town are under the impression I still go to school.

Morons or not, though, at least they were willing to give me a job at the bookstore. And I guess I gotta take what I can get.

They did give me the job on one condition, though.

Chapter 1: Burning Bridges (Mentions of attempted suicide)

Dear Journal:

Miraj is still pretty shook up over Iqbal's death. Probably because, unlike me, he actually liked the guy.

If the kid wanted to cry, I let him cry. There wasn't really anything I could do about it.

What I couldn't take was that it got so bad, he kept getting nightmares and waking up at the worst possible times of the night.

It's always the same nightmare, he says. He sees the fire, he hears Iqbal screaming. He wakes up right before he turns into ash, though.

And after that, he says he can't get back to sleep. Or rather, he doesn't want to.

...I don't blame him.

I told him earlier this morning, at least try to go to school. I could tell he didn't want to go, but I insisted. Dead Iqbal or not, he still needed to work on his education.

Or at least that's what I told him, anyway.

Prologue

Dear Journal:

I have no idea why the hell I decided to start writing one of these. Maybe it's because a few days ago, he was still around.

I'm gonna be brutally honest: I never always got along with Iqbal.

There were days I told him he sucked, to put it nicely. I even blamed him for Mom leaving.

A day didn't go by without me thinking of some awesome prank for him to deal with.

Hey, I figured he needed to lighten up once in a while. But no. He'd always say something like, "VJ, stop pulling that shit!"

The guy was lazy, never cared much for working. And even if I wasn't messing with him, I somehow got into trouble.

"Why are you such a bad kid?" He'd say. "Why can't you be more like your brother?" I guess sometimes he just needed a scapegoat.

At least we had Miraj there to keep things from getting too intense.

My little bro showed wisdom that most at that age have no chance of getting. He'd always try to get Iqbal to lay off me, and he'd try to get me to do the same.

Somehow, Miraj always knew when an argument was about to get out of control.

But he still needed some kind of parental guidance. He won't admit he did, but after Mom left, he was at a loss as to what to do.

I think we all were.

Then came that day. All I'm going to say is this: I may not have liked Iqbal...

But that doesn't mean I wanted him to die.

(End of Prologue.)